Sunday, August 1, 2010
Sea Legs
Welcome to a world that is completely your own. A world where things are created not destroyed. A world that contains a magnificent thrill and excitement, a world that composes new passions and an unparalleled sense of contentment. This world not only gives your the tools and mindset to create, build, or concoct new fascinating ideas, but it allows you to actualize them in reality. This is my world.
Monday, January 25, 2010
new slang
in response to mtv's new show, "the buried life" me and my friends have decided to create our own lists. 100 things to do before we die. i'll be recording each "thing" we plan to do and then hopefully following up once the task is complete. here is a list of the first ten.
100. i need to see a norah jones concert.
i love norah jones' music so incredibly much i cannot believe it has taken me this long to see her live. this one will hopefully get scratched off the list soon, this summer most likely.
99. direct a movie
although it would be equally challenging and rewarding to act in a movie, i've always wanted to go beyond one role and almost control every aspect of a film.
98. attend an ohio state michigan football game in ann arbor.
the greatest rivalry in sports. the game. the ohio state university versus michigan. as an avid tosu fan, attending this game would be like crossing enemy lines, being seen by the enemy, and the having to watch a 3 hour football game with them. it wouldnt be the most friendly environment, but seeing tosu beat up on the michigan wolverines would be worth the battle.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
australia
THE THREE LEVELS OF PERSONAL HELL
Spiraling endlessly through a vast, opaque vicinity teetering between the balance of reality and the unconscious mind, one finds itself falling. The soul bound body travels from absolute perceptibility towards the unknown. Actuality is discounted and the pursuit of eternity is found unwillingly. The enduring descent ceases and one’s surroundings is taken into account. Deep, profound darkness engrosses one’s sight, eerie silence consumes one’s hearing, and shivers are sent up and down one’s spine. The new setting is distant, emotionless, and dismal. When one looses spirit, love, or contact with the world this new scene of despair becomes home, one’s personal hell. Rejection, hate, and hopelessness are all catalyst for this journey to the inferno. Escape is wearisome and often painful, but the expedition through one’s self is necessary. As one tears away from society and conscious realism, down through the depths of hell they trek.
It is evident throughout any society or culture that acceptance is quintessential to a healthy self. To belong as a human in any medium is to say one has worth, importance, or unique quality. Throughout this pursuit rejection looms. The failed attempt to display one’s value incites the first stage of personal hell. One feels abandoned and wisps down the indistinct tunnel leading towards hell.
The darkness dematerializes and light floods the space. People occupy this stage hell, people one is familiar with, cares for, and loves. Life ensues and the compatibility between hell’s occupants is apparent. Laughter is heard, conversation commences, and visible affection is unmistakably noticeable. One travels this new world excited and filled with hope only to be crushed by rejection once again. None of the occupants converse with or acknowledge one’s presence. Disheartened and cast down, one is condemned to aimless wanderings. Life continues, filled with joy and love, but one is incapable of joining. Escape is bleak, but possible. Acceptance is the only counter to rejection and until one is able to accept some rejection and move on, they are doomed to a life of vagrancy. The real victor receives rejection, but still believes in one’s self worth and individuality.
Traveling deeper still into one’s psyche a darker more painful level of hell may be found. Hatred is an incendiary that sometimes engulfs one’s mind. It acts like poison, infecting each part of one’s self. One is consumed by it, possessing one’s thoughts, actions, and reactions. Hatred is the most dangerous stimulus for it causes deliberate harm and sorrow. Once hate becomes an obsession and begins to govern one’s actions, hell’s gates reopen.
Thrust back down the lightless tunnel, one feels as if the aura has changed. The surroundings are threatening as flames dance up and down the walls. An uncomfortable heat is emitted from the ground and shrieks of pain become audible. One walks further down the tunnel and each sense is overwhelmed by afflictive means. The tunnel ends and reveals an immense underground venue. Once again, the area is populated by familiar friends and family, but this level of hell exploits its inhabitants. The people are being brutally abused, both physically and emotionally all in accordance to treatment administered by oneself. Each malicious thought or action fueled by hate, designated for those people who contested with oneself, were now being preformed on the people one loves. Overcome with misery, one’s emotional state is off balance. The hate was promised to opposing adversaries, not loved ones. To survive this level of hell one must acquit all persons, learn to forgive, and dissolve all grudges. One must notice the pain of his loved ones in order to feel the pain one’s hate caused. Those who envision the consequences of one’s actions and act to avoid all negative connotations will victoriously survive the inferno.
The final level of personal hell brings us beyond physicalness, beyond senses, and beyond any human interaction. Hopelessness seeps through one’s outer being and into the shallow expanse of a damaged soul. The first two levels of personal hell encompass this disconnected development. Rejection ignites the fiery flames of hell, hatred adds fuel to the inferno, while hopelessness lies among the soul’s burnt ashes. The first two levels will damage parts of the human psyche and humble oneself, while hopelessness exhibits each personal fault, exemplifies it, then projects it slowly until the soul is completely dismantled. Failure works as a catalyst for one’s voyage into personal hell. As one sets forth, with the potential to succeed, but unwillingly collapses under the weight of loss, frustration assumes control. With frustration comes the acceptance of failure and the ideology of inadequacy. The deeper this belief grows, the stronger the roots will become, resulting in the third level of personal hell.
Falling past the sounds of laughter and conversation, past the flames of antagonizing antipathy, one finds its new surrounding distant. The ground is cold and uncomfortably firm. There is complete darkness, except for a dim light beaming on oneself. The room is filled with cobwebs, broken pieces of furniture, scattered newspapers headlining each shattered dream. The dim light follows one self, as to perpetually exemplify and keep one’s failures in light. Liberation from this level of personal hell seems unattainable. One must forget the past, seek improved progress, change, and hope for a more desirable future. To find success scaling this arduous mountain, one must hope beyond hope that freedom is possible. Once hope is attained hell’s grip will be triumphantly overpowered.
It is sometimes effortless to fall victim to one’s personal hell. With our culture’s pressure to personify perfection each day, failure can menacingly overshadow any success. The true testament to one’s life does not end with the admittance to hell, but how one’s mind conquered the evil and rectified the circumstances. Mahatma Gandhi once said, “You can chain me, you can torture me, you can even destroy this body, but you will never imprison my mind.” This quote explains the immense power the human mind possesses. Although, sin, pain, violence, evil, rejection, hatred, and hopelessness run rampant in the world today, our minds retain the ability to vanquish all adversity.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
SUICIDE ANYONE?
so here are a few pictures from creighton's production of suicide anyone. the play is separated into three different acts with three completely different stories. the first act is a centered around a relationship carousel, and how specifically one couple's problems affect a close friend. the second act is the story of a struggling actress who threatens suicide. her attempt is interrupted twice by two different unexpected guests who in turn affect her life dramatically. the final act is about two men and their rocky relationship. influenced by a conniving neighbor one party strategizes how to win the love of his partner.
i played the role of chandler in the third act. my gay partner in the play (chuck) was played by peter vartanian and the conniving neighbor was played by becky zais. i attached a review written by mark robinson from the omaha insider. i felt as if he was too critical of the first two acts. the actors in this play worked incredibly hard and did not deserve such a harsh review. but robinson did love the third act, especially peter's performance. this is my first onstage performance at the university so i was very interested in what the reviewer had to say. he had only positive things to report about me and the entire scene as a whole, to which i was pretty proud. enjoy
SUICIDE - ANYONE? - Creighton One-Acts an Uneven Theatre Experience
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SubscribeI caught the final performance of the Creighton University One-Acts and I left the theatre scratching my head as to why the final one-act of the set was leagues better than its predecessors. The entertainment entitled Suicide-Anyone? is a compilation of three one-act plays by John Patrick, each attempting to comedically take on the topic of death at ones own hands.
The first entry of the evening, under the name "Loyalty", told the story of a man trying to sleep. His best friend, who has just left his newlywed wife, shows up that the door in need of a place to crash. The wife calls, announces she is suicidal and the story unfolds as a comedy of errors sparked by manipulation and miscommunication. The premise and the situation are rife with possibility, but as directed by Wesley Pourier, it is a plodding, tentative affair. There are pregnant pauses and torpid acting to spare. The piece has a farcical nature and should have moved at a steady gait. Instead, no momentum or energy is allowed to build. Actors Zac Holmes, Miles Loggie and Kathleen Franco appear to be bored with the script and at times, speak in such a mumble, you are not sure what they saying.
The second of the set, entitled "Empathy", fares somewhat better. Again directed by Pourier, he manages to mine some credibility out of the more intimate moments of an actress whose lack of success has inspired her to kill herself. Kylee White tries hard to maintain some energy within the piece, but in the first half she is conspired against by the one-note Thomas Apitz playing a house painter who tries to cheer her up. It isn't until the arrival of Elliott Johnson as Speed, who manages some charm and vivacity, that the piece feels like we should give a damn.
In an extreme about face, Pourier helms the third one-act entitled "Confession" with confidence and humor that are sorely missed in the first two. This play, about a hyperneurotic homosexual man who is worried about people thinking he is gay, is an absurd half hour of spastic hilarity. Pourier finds his voice in this episode, exhausting both its physically comedic and sarcastic potential. He is aided by the brilliant performance of Peter Vartanian as Chuck, who hates the world viewing him as a fairy. Vartanian explodes with a bravura performance of frenetic hostility and wiry paranoia. You could light Albuquerque on the energy this actor uses to operate. He is supported by the solid performances of Jon Keating as his lover and Becky Zaiss as their next door neighbor. This one-act more than made up for the tediousness of the first two.
The production had a clinical and cold set design by Dan Herman and Patrick O'Malley. For an evening of comedy, it would have been nice if it had a warmer environment to encourage the mood for laughter. Fortunately, Mallory Freilich's costumes were both colorful and they helped to flesh out the personalities of the characters. Freilich has an eye for accentuating an actor's positives by using flattering colors and fitting the clothing to all the right places. The lighting design by Jerry Woiderski and Kenzie Hunter is serviceable, but seldom exceptional. A flaw can be found in the first show when each time an actor turns off/on one lamp, two lamps are effected. This is both distracting and unnecessary.
Suicide-Anyone? is hardly a complete evening of entertainment. It does, however, offer in its final third some terrific moments of comedy. Too bad the first two thirds could not be lavished with the same energy, staging and acting prowess.
so says i
Fact or Fiction
Religion, seen exclusively as an Earthly entity, fabricated and followed blindly by humans, can be characterized solely as an opiate. Searching extensively into the influence religion has had on the human psyche and the development of human action in accordance to active spirituality, one may find the result to revolve around human desensitization. Human action is understood to be the result of motive. Behind every human action there are three significant motives; achieving stability, gaining reward, and fulfilling a purpose. Coincidentally, religion satisfies each motive with a precise explanation and infallible direction on how to victoriously live one’s life. Supported by holy writings and ancient tradition, religion gives humanity purpose. This thought develops into the blind unrealistic sense of complacency found in religious human’s today.
Stability is a motive that humans continually experience, but rarely consider. People pursue profitable occupations to achieve stability. One works vigorously to earn a livable wage to achieve stability. The more fruitful a human’s life becomes, stability is more easily obtained. A stable life is ideal for every human, without stability chaos ensues, law and order is destroyed, and morality is abandoned. Fortunately, religion provides reason for stability and determines how society can achieve it. “By justice a king gives a country stability, but one who is greedy for bribes tears it down.” (Proverbs. 29: 4) The Holy Bible stresses stability to be accomplished only through a just government. Projecting the necessity for competent and moral leaders. The Holy Bible also warns its readers to avoid unethical behavior, for it results in destruction. The intention of stability is to avoid destruction. To avoid destruction act justly. If one acts justly stability is achieved. Orthodox humans will accept this passage as truth and act accordingly.
The most prevalent motive behind all human action is reward. All actions accomplished or attempted are predisposed to some type of reward. The reward may be physical, spiritual, mental, big, small, beneficial, or detrimental to others. Implicating ethical action, religion offers humanity numerous rewards including; everlasting life, favorable occurrences, peace of mind and heart. “Verily, those who have attained to faith, as well as those who follow the Jewish faith, and the Christians, and the Sabians-all who believe in God and the Last Day and do righteous deeds-shall have their reward with their Sustainer; and no fear need they have, and neither shall they grieve.” (Sura 2: 62) The Koran directs its readers towards the ultimate reward, eternal happiness. Those who possess the legitimate faith of the “Sustainer,” act justly, and accept specific holy traditions, are rewarded. Human nature motivates us subconsciously to desire happiness. The Koran presents direction on how to acquire happiness and the advantage of working towards a reward. Every action can be identified as either ethical or unethical. Ethical action compensates celestial retribution, while depraved acts leaves one alone and forgotten. Those who understand and trust The Koran will attempt to act justly in anticipation for an assumed reward.
The human motive of fulfilling one’s purpose encompasses all actions accomplished and all actions left undone. Who a person is can most clearly be defined as who a person is not. Actions derive from purpose and purpose derives from self. The totality of self is unique to each individual. The purpose of one’s life cannot be answered logically or scientifically, but only spiritually. Spiritually, in regards to one’s soul and one’s journey towards self actualization, not religion. According to certain religious texts, life’s meaning has one answer, encasing all humans. “But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.” (Exodus 9: 16) According to the text, the ultimate purpose of life is to proclaim god’s name. Religion stresses the importance of moral accomplishment and achievement, ethical exertion and effort, precise doctrine and absolute dogma. Religion as an entity resonates infinite knowledge and virtuous insight. Humanity supports individuality, choice, compromise, freedom, and change. Not a religious dictatorship. Religion’s purpose for humanity is too expand religion. Although, religion is an idea, a theory, a concept, an interpretation, a belief, people around the world comply to ancient texts and live according to their religion’s will.
The Holy Bible and The Koran, communicate the ideal human life. These holy texts assume humanity to fail without the supportive brace of religion. This may be true. The writings provide guidelines on how to live a just life, how to love one another, and how to cleanse one’s soul of evil. When civilizations abide by fundamental rules, brought to humans attention by religion, all three motives for human action may be satisfied. This result is obviously beneficial to humanity, but is it favorable for humans to live as drones under the influence of a religious opiate? Religion has faults, individual spirituality has none. If there are evident discrepancies with major aspects of religion, how can one believe? “In your majesty ride forth victoriously in behalf of truth, humility and righteousness; let your right hand display awesome deeds.” (Psalm 45: 4) This passage clearly identifies the importance of humility and the equivalence with humility and ethical deeds. The Holy Bible also stated the purpose of life was to proclaim the greatness of God our creator. The soul purpose of humanity is to evangelize a perfect, but excessively egotistical God. Until, humanity is awakened from its false and unrealistic sense of contentment, no person will understand the true meaning of life.
Bursting at the seams... first post.
This is the first post I've done since creating my new blog. I just wanted to start things off with attaching some of my interests in music, movies, and entertainment for you.
MUSIC (small collection)
the shins
norah jones
edward sharpe and the magnetic zeroes
missy higgins
rhcp
kate nash
mgmt
regina spektor
rilo kiley
vampire weekend
tokyo police club
dave matthew's band
john mayer trio
MOVIES
garden state
stranger than fiction
nightmare before christmas
clockwork orange
visoneers
love actually
sweeney todd
rent
informant
BOOKS
harry potter series
perks of being a wallflower
the great gatsby
dracula
catcher in the rye
kite runner
of mice and men
killer angles
i know this is a lame first post, but this is just a list of the things i am currently interested in
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